3 Tips--Learn how to Survive Infidelity

When someone in a relationship engages in infidelity, what happens next?  After someone cheats in a relationship, there are three situations that might occur, two of which lead to surviving infidelity:

1. The couple comes to terms with the infidelity; they discuss why the infidelity occurred and their resulting feelings.  They stay together, survive infidelity and get stronger.
2. The couple decides to stay together to work through feelings of anger, remorse, or betrayal.  They survive infidelity, but not necessarily happily.
3. The couple decides to end the relationship altogether.  They don't survive infidelity.

Coming To Terms With Infidelity

Behavior doesn't happen without a reason.  Both a cheating spouse and a faithful spouse have reasons for actions which led to infidelity.  A couple can start the healing process when they come to terms with the infidelity.  This means that both people agree to stop engaging in denial, blame, or attack, all of which create more damage in the relationship, and begin the process of surviving infidelity.
The couple should attend marital counseling, at least during the first few weeks after the affair, so they can communicate in an environment that allows both people to freely and safely vent their feelings.  Also, marital counseling provides a trained professional who can give the couple honest, open, and objective feedback.  This information can improve their communication skills and help them discuss the infidelity without personal attacks.  Also, it gives the couple time to work on surviving the infidelity and saving the relationship, instead of quickly moving toward separation or divorce.